I don’t mean to be rude but…..

How many of you are tired of the pithy little remarks that some people use to excuse themselves?

You know, like:
I don’t mean to be rude but…..(Simon Cowell of American Idol ilk used this as the title of his book.)
Don’t take this the wrong way….
No offence but….

To me, each of these cliched pre-ambles basically say I’m going to be rude but now you can’t complain. There is only one way for you to take this. I know it, you know it but maybe they won’t know it. However now I look politically correct and if you take offense, you are at fault.

I find these to be just slightly less offensive than the classic "It isn’t personal. Its just business.". Every time I hear this one I want to say "How nice for you that you don’t take it personal. If you were a better person, maybe you would!"

What other ones are you tired of?
Or should we only ridicule those that offer FREE GIFTS ?

Free toy inside! Welcome to the way to tear someone down the politically correct way. :rolleyes:

Hey, this reminds me having heard that Terry Pratchett hates the acronym IMHO, which, according to him, means "That what I mean, and I challenge anyone to say anything against it" (that's not the exact quote).

However this is not the one I'm personnally the most miffed about. Some I have seen :
"In all honesty/To be brutally honest..."
"To be blunt..."

Well that's the way to speak the Internet way now, it seems.

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Originally posted by C5

"In all honesty/To be brutally honest..."
"To be blunt..."

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Hey, at least I warned you with those first four words in the beginning of my first sentence. You don't have to read further. :p

"You can't handle the truth!"
"Fact is evident. Truth is relevant."

So often, in the discourse of ideas and opinions that message boards are filled with, the tone becomes hopelessly adversarial. Even otherwise polite people suddenly become rabid and defensive in this faceless forum. Egos and tempers flare where they never would if discussions were face to face. Often, even just disagreeing with someone sets off a fiery exchange of barbs and cheap shots.

Nature of the beast, I suppose.


Strictly Speaking

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Originally posted by C5
"In all honesty

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I had someone use this on me not too long ago. I interrupted and asked him if everything else he had said was a lie. It just struck me as extremely odd to have to preface an idea with In all honesty . However, I only received an odd look and a statement that may or may not be true. :(

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Originally posted by REG
You don't have to read further.

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That reminds me of one of the things we discussed in one course about terms and phrases that no longer have meaning but are still used.

For example the phrase "How are you?" no longer has any meaning. Most people that still use this as a greeting, really have no desire for you to answer this with something other than "I'm well" or "I'm Fine" . Anything other than these two responses will get you the moment of confused silence. :eek:

"With all due respect" has to be on this list. I guess it's supposed to me "I respect you but hold a different view", but I always think it means "You're an idiot unworthy of respect". After all, "With all due respect" could be zero respect, if that's what you think they're "due"...

It's not for me to say, but. . .

Worked with a guy for six years that used that one. :rolleyes:

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Originally posted by Kaiddin
That reminds me of one of the things we discussed in one course about terms and phrases that no longer have meaning but are still used.

For example the phrase "How are you?" no longer has any meaning. Most people that still use this as a greeting, really have no desire for you to answer this with something other than "I'm well" or "I'm Fine" . Anything other than these two responses will get you the moment of confused silence. :eek:

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Actually not as much confused silence if you respond with, "I'm doing fine now that the itching has stopped and the rash disappeared..."

How about "If you don't mind me saying...?"


Strictly Speaking

How about "If you don't mind me saying...?"
"And if I do, the what?"

"It's not for me to say, but..."
"You are going to anyway!"

"Would you mind passing the salt?"
"Well, yes actually. Get in yourself!"

"I can honestly say that...."
"You mean you lie about other stuff you tell me? Gee, thanks!"

"Wow! Did you see that?"
"No, I'm sorry, I was looking totally the other way, and was not watching (The road/ The film/ That spectacular meteorite impact)!!!"

"Could you tell me the time?"
"Well, yes.....I could. Do you want me to?"

Any statement of the bloody obvious:
EG: "It's hot, isn't it?"
"Well, actually, I was thinking of putting on a coat, I seem to be shivering is this paltry 100F!"

Just a few of my least favourite phrases and the kinds of responses I am tempted to make....


Cheers

Tas

"Mind if I smoke?"

"I don't care if you burst into flames..."

:D

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Originally posted by Aldaron
"Mind if I smoke?"
:D

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"don't mind if I do."

What does that mean?

Also, "I could care less..." Shouldn't this be "I couldn't care less..." given the context in which it's usually used?


Strictly Speaking

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Originally posted by Tas II
How about "If you don't mind me saying...?"
"And if I do, the what?"

"It's not for me to say, but..."
"You are going to anyway!"

"Would you mind passing the salt?"
"Well, yes actually. Get in yourself!"

"I can honestly say that...."
"You mean you lie about other stuff you tell me? Gee, thanks!"

"Wow! Did you see that?"
"No, I'm sorry, I was looking totally the other way, and was not watching (The road/ The film/ That spectacular meteorite impact)!!!"

"Could you tell me the time?"
"Well, yes.....I could. Do you want me to?"

Any statement of the bloody obvious:
EG: "It's hot, isn't it?"
"Well, actually, I was thinking of putting on a coat, I seem to be shivering is this paltry 100F!"

Just a few of my least favourite phrases and the kinds of responses I am tempted to make....


Cheers

Tas

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"Do you mind" is definately funny. I responded to one person "Actually, I have no opinion." Which, of course led to "Could you pass the salt?" Looking at my nephew, sitting beside the guy, I said "Probably." My nephew turned to the guy and said "May I have the salt, please?" That is when the light bulb went on. :)

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Also, "I could care less..." Shouldn't this be "I couldn't care less..." given the context in which it's usually used?

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Well, maybe the person is just leaving a bit of room at the bottom. Just in case.

Another one that drives me up the wall is "Whatever!" . I don't care what tone is used, this is just dismissive. Basically saying you are not worth the effort.

Just thought of another one.
"To make a long story short...."
I always want to say "Too late!"

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Originally posted by Kaiddin
How many of you are tired of the pithy little remarks that some people use to excuse themselves?

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This only says that some people make these remarks to excuse themselves, but what about the other people? You never said that "all people" do it to excuse themselves.
I take this as meaning that from where you stand some people don't use it as an excuse. How do you tell them apart? How do you feel about those who don't use it as an excuse?

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No offence but...
...To me, each of these cliched pre-ambles basically say I’m going to be rude but now you can’t complain.

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Now this is a good one. How about reading this as "I know you will be offended by my opinion, you being the opinionated dork you are, but it isn't meant to offend you, as it is only my personal opinion, while you can't even look beyond your own narrow mindset"?
What's so darn wrong with that? It could be just a way someone recognizes that you will be offended by whatever he/she says and taking the wind out off your sails before you blow a fuse. If that is so it is indeed a hollow phrase, as you will never allow another opinion to stand besides your own.

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What other ones are you tired of?

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Oh, so we are as tired of those remarks as you are? How very perceptive of you!
Yes, indeed, we are all as tired as you are of the phrases you quoted. Glad you pointed that out to me, as I may not have recognized that without your generous help. :rolleyes:

Nota bene:
The above is not meant to be taken completely serious, but any way I can think of to express that would have used one or more of the phrases that apparently piss of someone. :p

Instead of IMHO, I use IMNAAHO.

In My Not-At-All Humble Opinion.

Because I am, of course, always right. :D

"To be honest" usually seems to me to mean "I'm about to draw a conclusion which you will probably find offensive, but which I nevertheless believe to be true. Please don't hit me."

"With all due respect" means "I'm about to tell you you're a frickin' moron, but I don't want you to fire/hit me."

The Zaldans would be appalled.

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Originally posted by First of Two
"With all due respect" means "I'm about to tell you you're a frickin' moron, but I don't want you to fire/hit me."

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No, it doesn't. If you think the "due respect" for you someone mentions is no respect at all, that's your problem, not theirs. :D;)

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This only says that some people make these remarks to excuse themselves, but what about the other people?

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How about, they don't use that phrase. :rolleyes:

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How about reading this as "I know you will be offended by my opinion, you being the opinionated dork you are, but it isn't meant to offend you, as it is only my personal opinion, while you can't even look beyond your own narrow mindset"?

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Well this certainly proves my case for me. Omniscience and arrogance. :D

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Oh, so we are as tired of those remarks as you are? How very perceptive of you!

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Bit of a stretch there. What other ones are you tired of? If it will make you feel better replace other ones with remarks . Wouldn't want you to read something negative there. :D :rolleyes: :D

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The above is not meant to be taken completely serious, but any way I can think of to express that would have used one or more of the phrases that apparently piss of someone.

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But isn't it better to be pissed off than pissed on? :D

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Originally posted by Kaiddin
That reminds me of one of the things we discussed in one course about terms and phrases that no longer have meaning but are still used.

For example the phrase "How are you?" no longer has any meaning. Most people that still use this as a greeting, really have no desire for you to answer this with something other than "I'm well" or "I'm Fine" . Anything other than these two responses will get you the moment of confused silence. :eek:

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Oooh yeah, that rings a big bell. At some time in my student life, I used to answer to "how are you" by "good... I guess" or "Whatever" or "Trying"... and got indeed very strange looks and questions. After a while, I avoided this by agressively asking "How are you" first, so people did not care about my answer anymore.

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Originally posted by Lancer
No, it doesn't. If you think the "due respect" for you someone mentions is no respect at all, that's your problem, not theirs. :D;)

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With all due respect... BLEAH!!! :D

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Originally posted by Kaiddin
How about, they don't use that phrase. :rolleyes:

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Geez, sorry for mistaking your intentions. I thought you were all in favor of spelling out what you meant instead of being ambiguous. :p

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Bit of a stretch there. What other ones are you tired of? If it will make you feel better replace other ones with remarks . Wouldn't want you to read something negative there. :D :rolleyes: :D

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See above. If you are opposed to others not meaning what they say, than why shouldn't I take what you say literally? I.e. this thread is not about what makes me feel beter, but about what makes you feel bad, or I did I get something wrong here?
And hey, if you don't want me to read something into what you say (besides what you actually intend to say) than why not spell it out clearly in the first place. :p

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But isn't it better to be pissed off than pissed on? :D

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You make it sound like those are the only choices. Me, I like nothing better than watching other people pee themselves, without me getting in their way. ;)


I realize my last few posts may be seen as a blatent attempt at trolling, but I am only trying to get three points across:
(1) Some people may actually mean what they say, however ambiguous their wording may sound to the person they are talking to, as truth is always in the ear of the listener.
(2) People sometimes express themselves in the way they have been "trained" to express themselves. Perhaps there is no deeper meaning behind it than what amounts to a mere "social convention" for most persons. Me, I wouldn't want to blame someone for just being the product of the society that raised him/her.
(3) Put your money where your keyboard is. If you critize people for expressing themselves in ambiguous terms do so in unambiguous ways. Unless you can think of a way to do so that is absolutely crystal clear, don't be surprised if what you say is challenged in much the same way you challenge what others say, i.e. no one is perfect. not even me (which may be hard to believe, but is still true). :p;)

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Originally posted by C5
Oooh yeah, that rings a big bell. At some time in my student life, I used to answer to "how are you" by "good... I guess" or "Whatever" or "Trying"... and got indeed very strange looks and questions. After a while, I avoided this by agressively asking "How are you" first, so people did not care about my answer anymore.

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Another one:
"Have a nice day!"
What only a nice one? What if I wanted a great one? Maybe I'm in a bad mood and don't want a nice day? :D

For the PCs:
Have (or not, whatever your choice) a good (or multiple, bad, great, nice or whatever your choice) day (or time period of your choice). (please do not feel constrained in any manner.)
:D

Lancer: "no one is perfect. not even me (which may be hard to believe, but is still true)."

Nope, perfectly easy to believe..... :D

Cheers

Tas

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Originally posted by C5
Oooh yeah, that rings a big bell. At some time in my student life, I used to answer to "how are you" by "good... I guess" or "Whatever" or "Trying"... and got indeed very strange looks and questions. After a while, I avoided this by agressively asking "How are you" first, so people did not care about my answer anymore.

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Me, I make it a point to answer that question as completely and truthfully as I can, without distracting from the topic at hand too much. (Because there may be topics I would really like to talk about more than how I am.)

An explanation may be in order here:
Working as an adminsitrative assistant I get asked the "how are you" question a lot on the phone. With some people I just know it's not such a good idea to tell them how I truly feel (I /do/ want to keep my job ye know :)), but whenever I can I answer the question as much as time allows.
Depending on my mood and the person I am talkin to that may amount to anything from "it's too hot for comfort" to "I had a really bad week because of xxx".
I find it amazing how often this will entice people to tell me about how /they/ feel, at least concerning the topic I mentioned myself.

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I realize my last few posts may be seen as a blatant attempt at trolling,

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Since I am not speaking for anyone other than myself, I assumed that is what you were doing. Thank you for clearing up any ambiguity. :D

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1) Some people may actually mean what they say, however ambiguous their wording may sound to the person they are talking to, as truth is always in the ear of the listener.

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Some people? I've heard that before. :p I have noticed that some people will purposely miscontrue a statement to fit their spin. :)

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2) People sometimes express themselves in the way they have been "trained" to express themselves.

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And?

Hey Don! These smilie things don't seem to be working!

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3) Put your money where your keyboard is.

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And be the only one? ;)


Disclaimer: None of the previous posts where intended to be taken seriously. Thankfully, some here realized that and maybe even gave a nod to the grain of truth I was pointing out. If it hit too close to home for someone, that wasn't my intention.

My preferred responses to "How Are You?"

"...not dead."

"...good with mayo."

"...incredible, she said."

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Originally posted by Kaiddin
that wasn't my intention.

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That's another one!!!


Strictly Speaking