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Thread: Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Apr 2001
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    Fort Dodge, IA, USA
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    Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity

    Fourteen Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity:

    14: Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you have a headache.

    13: Skip down teh hall rather than walk and see how many looks you get.

    12: Specify that your drive-through order is, "To go."

    11: At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

    10: Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

    9: When the money comes out of the ATM, scream, "I won! I won!"

    8: Finish all your sentences with, "In accordance with the prophecy."

    7: In the memo field of all your checks, write, "For Marijuana."

    6: When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives! They're loose! They're all loose!"

    5: Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.

    4: Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

    3: Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

    2: Everytime someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

    1: Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice!
    Steven "redwood973" Wood

    "Man does not fail. He gives up trying."

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Mar 2001
    Location
    Bremen, Germany
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    Quote Originally Posted by redwood973 View Post


    3: Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.

    2: Everytime someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

    1: Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice!

    I like the last three most. They are hillarious, to bad I don't have an intercom where I work.
    We came in peace, for all mankind - Apollo 11

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Jun 2000
    Location
    Canonsburg, Pennsylvania
    Posts
    2,548
    I've actually done two of those things.
    "It's hard being an evil genius when everybody else is so stupid" -- Quantum Crook

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Aug 2004
    Location
    Swartz Creek, MI
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    889
    Quote Originally Posted by redwood973 View Post
    Fourteen Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity:

    <snip>

    12: Specify that your drive-through order is, "To go."
    <snip>
    3: Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
    <snip>
    How about 12. "Specify that your drive-through order is, "For Here".
    3. Order a dehydrated water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.


    My Dad would joking ask when go to various resturants if they have "Lamb, ram, sheep or mutton".
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