You're surrounded by killer Smurfs...

[Gabriel]

OK, everyone. You're trapped on a planet of killer Smurfs (sounds like an episode of Voyager doesn't it?). No, not Smurves; Smurfs is the correct plural form. Anyway, there are these hordes of bloodthirsty Smurfs around you. What starfleet captain would you most want by your side?

Kirk = For his ability to mindlessly kick tail and seduce Smurfette threby causing Papa Smurf to surrender.

Picard = For his ability to surrender, bore all the Smurfs into a stupor, and to relate with Papa Smurf on some kind of old leader geezer level thereby earning your freedom.

Sisco = For the abilities of being able to order the Bajoran Gods to take all the Smurfs to never never land and to order Worf to go assasinate Papa Smurf.

Janeway = For her miraculous ability to rewrite the script, ignore canon, and kick all the Smurfs tails despite the fact that there is no possible reasonable way that she could.

OR

A bunch of redshirts = For their ability to appease the killer Smurfs with their pointless deaths while you make your escape.

Yes. I'm tired and bored.


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Gabriel Alexander Vampyre

[Phantom]

Why is everyone stuck on this Picard surrendering thing? He "surenddered" like three times in the serise. Aren't we forgeting the Battle of Maxia, the Picard Manuever, battling the Borg on more than one occassion (and winning), going after Data in "First Contact", standing up for the pricples of the Federation to ADM Doreghty, etc. etc.

When you are overwelemed sometimes the discretion is the better part of valour.

[Phantom]

Oh, and to answer your question none of the above. I perfer Capt. Maxwell, he'll think they are trying to invade the Federation and vapourise their tiny blue butts.

[Phantom]

Oh, and to answer your question...None of the above. I prefer Capt. Maxwell, he'll think they are trying to invade the Federation and vapourise their tiny blue butts enmass.

[Dan Gurden]

You forgot two other captains

Weyoun

Bring on the Jem'Hadar, there is an active resistance of small Blue creatures with squeky voices. Kill them all...

or the Borg Queen.

"Spiecies 47720 known as the smurfs, you will cease your resistance and prepare for assimilation, what little technology and culture distinctivness you have will be added to the collective"


------------------
Dan.

"A couple of thoughts from a random mind!"
http://www.theventure.freeserve.co.uk

[Imagus]

Surely Janeway leaves the planet as the only survivor, feels guilty about it for 20 years, then breaks all the rules to travel back in time to advise you never to go there in the first place?

I always liked this one - confronted with a stand off:

Kirk: You have until the count of three before I open fire. One... Two... Fire!

Picard: You have until the count of three before I open fire. One... I am serious about this... Two... I will open fire... Three... It's your last chance to back down... Four... Look, can we talk about this?



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Slartibart-Jon

[qerlin]

None of the above...gimme CPT Jellico. Nothing like a professional soldier and a hawk for doing the little blue bastards nasty.

[StyroFoam Man]

This message has been removed on request by the
poster

[ComaBoy]

I always thought that Kirk was crafty enough to get out of any situation he blundered into while Picard was smart enough not to blunder in the first place....

[Robbert Raets]

Dan:
Borg Smurfs!!?!
'Resistance is futile, tra la la la!'
'You will be asimilated, la la la la laaa!'

.... Um...

[Sarge]

Unfortunately, I think Worf would be allergic to smurfs. After all, they're small, soft, cute, cuddly, and many humanoids find them pleasant.

"Well, there's no accounting for taste." [/Kirk voice]

------------------

<<<<

LUGTrek isn't really dead. Not as long as we remember it.

[Rottwang]

Run for your lives. Borg smurfs, they are small cute and they will assimilate you, but not before singing to you.

Personally, I would like to see a Kirk chop down on Papa Smurf.

------------------
"The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of
their dreams."
--Eleanor Roosevelt

[Flamestrike]

How about the alien captain from "Darmok"?

"Gargamel, his cooking pot open!"

"Azrael,with his claws gleaming"

and for the record, Sisko would step on them, and Worf would put on spiked tapshoes and riverdance all over them.

[Robert Lai]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Dan Gurden:

the Borg Queen.

"Species 47720 known as the smurfs, you will cease your resistance and prepare for assimilation, what little technology and culture distinctivness you have will be added to the collective"

</font>

"Um, Sir? Why are those Borg drones wearing floppy white hats?"

[Dan Gurden]

<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">Originally posted by Robbert Raets:
Dan:
Borg Smurfs!!?!
'Resistance is futile, tra la la la!'
'You will be asimilated, la la la la laaa!'

.... Um...

</font>

Thank you, I havn't laughed so much in ages...



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Dan.

"A couple of thoughts from a random mind!"
http://www.theventure.freeserve.co.uk