Downloadable Adventure: Barahir's Ring

[ben hur]

The first half of Barahir's Ring, a mini-adventure written over the past few days by yours truly, is ready to be downloaded! (as long as it works )

Contrary to what you might think from it's deceptive title, the adventure is set in the Third Age, and Barahir does not feature in it at all (although of course his ring does). Barahir's ring itself does not come into this section, because this is only the first half and the next three scenes will deal with the Lossoth (and the Ring of Barahir), an Ice-giant (is he truly as evil as he sounds?), and a massive battle against the Forces of Angmar.

Please tell me if you have any problems with it at all, including (but not limited to) how it downloads, the format, the pictures, spelling and grammar, and inaccuracies both historical, physical, and rules-wise.

Thank you for all comments and criticism!

[macaddicttt]

I downloaded the file, but I cannot open it. Acrobat says that it is a damaged file.

[ben hur]

Yes, my big bad. The reason is it's too big I believe; like it's 1.2 MB when the maximum is 1.1 MB or something. So I'm going to see if I can tune it down to a slightly smaller size.

Thanks for the trial, macaddictt! I'll see if I can fix it as soon as I can.

[macaddicttt]

I hope you get the file up soon! I'm really looking forward to seeing what kind of adventure you can write, as I have really enjoyed your previous works for the RPG. I'll be sure to give some helpful comments once you get it up (despite the fact I am relatively new to RPGs).

[ben hur]

Thanks! I think it just might work now (please say it's so!). I had to cut a few nice pictures (sob!), but I'm going to see if I can get a copy to Darrel Miller for MEGG that has all the pictures, that'd be sweet.

Just test the download, that'd be enough, and any more help after that I'd love!

[ben hur]

Going to bed now, so I'll read your comments in the morning! If it doesn't work still I'll try and fix it, and if it does I'll be immensely happy.

[Ineti]

I downloaded the file and will take a look at it in detail tomorrow.

My first comment/request, following a cursory flip-through of it, would be to remove all of the images. They don't add anything special to the file other than increasing the size of the final file. It took a little while to get the file downloaded on my crappy dial-up connection, FWIW.

Sure the images are pretty, and make the file purty, but they're not really essential to the adventure.

JMHO.

[macaddicttt]

Well, I've had a chance to skim the aventure, but not enough time to read it properly, but of what I've seen it looks very good. I especially like the tests that the PCs must take on the journey north. I always have trouble making the journeys interesting and I am sure to find inspiration in your adventure. I think I will try running this adventure with my younger brothers who have been begging me to Narrate for them, but are too young to play in the group with whom I usually play.

Thanks for the great introductory adventure that will be very useful! Keep up the good work!

[ben hur]

Thank you both!

macaddicttt: I'm glad you like it, feel free to point out anything wrong about it, or anything that could be added. Thanks!

Ineti: Yes, do look further in the morning! I just changed the file, now it's one with no pics, thanks for the heads-up. I'm going to wait to have one with pictures until the whole thing is done and it can be put somewhere like MEGG or S & K.

Now I've got to work on the next part... but I'm going to wait and see what comments the first one provokes. It'll give me some breathing space too.

[Alathriel]

I liked the first half of the adventure, here are the things I enjoyed most-
-Simple, yet mysterious start. Works wonders. They know they are going to help the Lossoth, but they don't know if the Witch King has returned or what's going on... adds to the level of tension and fear.
-The tests going North were excellent. They were both challenging and require teamwork and careful thinking from the company. Nice job.
-The music selection, awesome touch! I love using music for appropriate scenes.
Suggestions for improvement:
-Copy everything into Word and do a spellcheck. I noticed at least two errors. No biggie.
-The "spiritual cold" they felt at the standing stones confused me. Will that be explained further, through a possible attack by a wight or spirit? If you aren't going to develop this further, I would suggest instead having them make a reaction test against Fear because of the great many howling wolves that startle them after this leg of their journey.This would make some sense, due to the fact that the last thing they need before camp is an attack by wolves.
-Put the pics back in! Can't wait to see them
I'll be waiting to see the rest!
P.S. This would be a great little adventure to send my players on if they didn't just finish a whole chronicle where a reborn Thuringwethil was searching for her bat-fell in the North, while gathering the orcish tribes to destroy the remaining Dunedain, picking up where the Witch-King left off. They can't go back North just yet

[Jason Durall]

Nice work here. I like the fact that it's a relatively simple scenario - much easier to get a variety of characters involved in.

[ben hur]

Thanks for the nice long post, Alathriel! Feedback like this is exactly what I love most.

Reading through, I noticed a couple grammatical mistakes already, which I'll try and correct. And I'll run it through the spell-checker, totally forgot to do that, heh.

Great idea about changing the Willpower test, I'll do that as soon as I can get to it. I'm not sure when the second part will be ready... it's going to be a little bit harder and longer, and with schoolwork starting this week I won't have the loads of time I did before. But I'll try and get it done quickly!

As soon as I've got both parts ready I'm going to send them to Darrel Miller and see if he can put it up, pictures and all.

BTW, thanks for the comment, Jason!

[Alathriel]

You're welcome Ben. Hope to see it soon!

[macaddicttt]

Well, I finished reading the adventure and I must say that I like it a lot. I especially liked the fear test and battle with the wolves to keep the PCs on their toes. As I said before, I'll probably run this adventure with my brothers, so I'm really looking forward to the next part.

The real value of this adventure to me was inspiration. I learned narrating from books and not from other people, so I never really know how much of a script I should have prepared or what kind of tests to give to my players. I appreciate the explantion of the modifiers to the tests, too, as I can see examples of the kind of tests I can do.

That said, though, I have one quibble with the adventure. The way that the narrating parts are written, aren't very Tolkien-sounding. A few passages are written awkwardly, or at least in my humble opinion. I would recomend re-reading what you have read and smoothing out the language to get a more Tolkien-ish feel from the adventure.

Thanks again for a great adventure and keep up the good work!

[ben hur]

Originally posted by macaddicttt
Well, I finished reading the adventure and I must say that I like it a lot. I especially liked the fear test and battle with the wolves to keep the PCs on their toes. As I said before, I'll probably run this adventure with my brothers, so I'm really looking forward to the next part.

Great!

The real value of this adventure to me was inspiration. I learned narrating from books and not from other people, so I never really know how much of a script I should have prepared or what kind of tests to give to my players. I appreciate the explantion of the modifiers to the tests, too, as I can see examples of the kind of tests I can do.

The LotR RPG is my first RPG, and none of my friends have roleplayed before either, so writing this and getting feedback from you guys has helped in that I learn what's wrong with my methods.

That said, though, I have one quibble with the adventure. The way that the narrating parts are written, aren't very Tolkien-sounding. A few passages are written awkwardly, or at least in my humble opinion. I would recomend re-reading what you have read and smoothing out the language to get a more Tolkien-ish feel from the adventure.

I'll get on it right away. This is the first draft, so it's totally open to change. Just to clear this up: by 'narrating parts' you mean the text in blue? Just to make sure.

Thanks again for a great adventure and keep up the good work!

Thank you!