From the various sources we've seen; The Romulan war IS exactly why all of the major races of the federation banded together. While it seemed to be nothing much more of a minor skirmish, it must have proved to be enough of a threat to those races for it to get them to band together. WHich is why the Temporal Cold war and Xindi thing make that weaker, because respectivelly the Xindi appear to be more advanced and more of a threat to 'Earth' than the Romulans of that period were. (though the Romulans of course are expansionist and the Xindi may be persuaded to back off once the obviousness of their own stupidity in being manipulated by the TCW players becomes clear).
With regards to the AkiraprIse. Yes matt Jeffries' work from the 60's does look a little silly these days, but as I've said before - with a nice coat of paint the Refit enterprise looked pretty sexy - and so could a Dadelus class vessel. Yes the shape is boxy, but as people have pointed out it was only seen partially, so they could have 'tweaked' it - even saying 'this is the precursor to the Daedelus, which is the first true Federation vessel' - and made it more amenable and asthetically pleasing. The whole Akiraprise problem could have been solved if they'd simply not made it look like something from the 24th century too! it's annoying too, because they've made such a bang up job on the Andorians and especially Vulcans ships - which DOES fit canon - so why take one and not the other!