Fourteen Ways to Maintain a Healthy Level of Insanity:
14: Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you have a headache.
13: Skip down teh hall rather than walk and see how many looks you get.
12: Specify that your drive-through order is, "To go."
11: At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
10: Tell your children over dinner, "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
9: When the money comes out of the ATM, scream, "I won! I won!"
8: Finish all your sentences with, "In accordance with the prophecy."
7: In the memo field of all your checks, write, "For Marijuana."
6: When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives! They're loose! They're all loose!"
5: Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.
4: Put decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
3: Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat, with a serious face.
2: Everytime someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
1: Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice!